My first “Aha!” moment during this class happened as we were
analyzing the article “The Romance and the Empowerment of Women” by Susan
Phillips about why women like to read romance novels. Up until that point I had
been so confused about why I liked reading the Nora Roberts book (and all
romance novels in general) so much when I thought of myself as a feminist. As I
was reading the article, the picture became more and more clear. All women need
a break from their daily lives. Romance novels are just some women’s way of
escaping from the real world and having a sense of being in control. “Instead,
the fantasy these novels offered me was one of command and control over the
harum scarum events of my life- a fantasy of female empowerment” (Phillips 55).
On top of that, although I never realized it, in the romance novel the female
always tames the wild and dangerous male into a caring and nurturing companion.
YAY! I could still be considered a feminist even though I enjoyed romance
novels! Life was good again.
Reflecting
deeper, my second “moment” so to speak occurred when I came across the quote to
the left. When I first told people I was going to be taking this class, many
stared at me like I was crazy. I think most people in Wisconsin wondered what
kind of hippie school out in Colorado would even offer such a course. I began
to question if I had really chosen the right first-quarter seminar, or if it
would be just as worthless as everyone I talked to seemed to think it would be.
What people didn’t say, or how the tone in their voice shifted showed me what
their opinion was about this subject. They either saw knowledge about “feminism”
and/or “romance” as pointless knowledge.
Looking back, I could not be happier that I chose to take this course. I have learned so much about myself as a person, as well as challenging my analytical and writing skills. How I plan to live my life balancing feminism and romance seems to make more and more sense and I am pretty pleased to say that I have also realized I was balancing them fairly well before I even decided to take this course. Of course, like with anything there are always improvements that can be made, but overall feminism and romance are both large and mostly equal parts of my life. When I go home this winter, I can’t wait to tell those same people who judged me before about how much I enjoyed this class and teach them a point or two about why feminism and the romance still matter today and how they correlate with one another. Maybe they’ll judge me even more, but in my mind it’s worth it. This class has taught me that sometimes you have to fight for what you believe in, and that is something that I will carry with me forever.
Dear Erin –
ReplyDeleteI understand exactly what you mean by other people looking at you differently, or judging you more, after you told them about this class. I had the same experience, except that mine was with other freshman at DU! The entire first week of school, everyone was discussing what there FSEM was, and I often hesitated to bring mine up, for fear of other’s opinions. But slowly, throughout our weeks of lass together, I cared less about what other people that and more about what I myself was feeling. It got to the point that I would bring up the topic on my own, proving a point, and sounding fairly intelligent if I do say so myself. Just the other day, there were two girls in my room, talking about feminism. They were laughing about how someone came up and tried to talk to them about something “feminist,” but they said that they weren’t feminist so they didn’t really care. My ears perked up at that, and of course, I just had to quote Moran. “Put your hand in your pants. A, do you have a vagina? And B, do you want to be in charge of it? If you said ‘yes’ to both, then congratulations! You’re a feminist”(Moran 75). Of course they both looked at me like I was crazy, but after about 3 seconds went by, they started discussing it and agreeing with me. Success!
I can also relate to your excitement about being able to call yourself a feminist even though you love to read romance novels. I too have spent countless hours reading romance novels, and then feeling guilty because of the idea that I was shaming my entire gender. Now, thanks to the many theorists we have read, I no longer feel that way. I completely agree with Krentz idea that reading romance, or really anything we want, under so much adversity shows how truly feminist we are. “The fact that so many women persist in reading and enjoying romance novels in the face of generations of relentless hostility says something profound not only about women’s courage but about the appeal of the book”(Krentz 1). In the past, I always tried to hide the fact that I was reading a romanced novel, but no more! We will go out and show the world that we refuse to be accepted for anything less than who we are, and if we need a break from the world to read about an amazingly strong woman doing the exact same thing, than so be it. The can judge us or not, but we will never change ourselves to please them.
Dear Erin,
ReplyDeleteI can honestly say that I completely relate with the reactions that you got after you told people back home that you will be taking a class called “Feminism and Romance”. Whenever, I would inform people of this class they would automatically look at me and assume that I was a radical feminist that hated men and was out to avenge all the transgressions that women have had to face for many years. In fact, more people were actually appalled by the fact that the class would actually incorporate romance, thus, they were also a little bit more judgmental than they should have been. “I am a feminist… It’s probably one of the most important things a woman can say” (Moran). There is nothing wrong with claiming feminism and femininity as the same time. It is definitely possible to want to be a feminist without having to sell out on the romantic aspect of one’s life.
Second, romance reading is definitely based on each individual person. When women read romance novels they are automatically considered as being too feminine and in need of a man within their lives. However, although men can use sports as a form of escapism and entertainment, women are reprimanded for using romance novels in the same fashion. In fact, romance novels can actually empower women rather than make them sexual beings. “All his muscle, wealth, authority are useless against her courage, intelligence, generosity, loyalty, and kindness” (Phillips). Romance novels give women a more feminine way of coming out on top and winning over the man rather than having to forsake their femininity and try to ‘take them on’ in a more masculine manner.